Peeps mi, how y'all doing, hope you all had a great weekend.
First drum roll for 30+ as per her debut on Blog Academie, thank you very much, it was not easy but I had to write a very hard common entrance examination (a.k.a hounding madam Catwalq, lol).
Class is interestng and it looks like I am already forming with one Jeremy dude (a.k.a teacher's pet or oyinbo boy), I do hope Catwalq is not using style to matchmake me sha (ha ha 30+ meshionu, enuff of matchmaking already).
Secondly I have a mild stalker (no cars following me or phone tapping yet) but I have promised to give you a breathing space on my seemingly booming single life and Dufusticous offers (at least for this post and maybe the next).
Anyhow, weekend was one kind for me o, why you asked, well mama 30+ is not in town, she went to see her peeps and no I am not sulking or nofink. Thing is we have been keeping in touch every other day mainly she flashes and I call her back type of keeping in touch. Last friday morning that's how she flashed me again and I called her what did I hear, mama 30+'s mouth making some silent noise shi ishh;
30+: Ki lo nse yin? (what is wrong with you?).
Mama 30+: "Wo I ain't going nowhere o, otutu nmu mi (I am feeling cold), right from the inside" 30+: What!!! Otutu ninu tropical country like that. I have told you to come back since, don't even know what you are still doing, lati ojo yi (since all this days).
Mama 30+: 30+, leave me alone, mo nlo lie down for a while.
30+: Ok will call back in the evening.
Now I was major upset, as far as I am concerned, she is just like a lamb among wolves with all those blood and money sucking people who call themselves friends and family.
I did not call in the evening, I patiently waited till Saturday (so she could rest). I called my mama's phone like 10 times throughout Saturday, sometimes it will ring, sometimes straight to voicemail, ah ah fear was kashing me big time. If anything happens to my mum, I will so strangle every single one of them, personally. Okay I sat in my room shaking leg, kept calling intermittenly still no reply, I texted her nofink. I started thinking irrationally, should I just buy my ticket ki nlo jaba awon people yi ni (go and surprise these peeps) and bundle my mummy on the plane one time. Called my friend and gave her the low down, right there and then we prayed prayed about it, "there will be no problem" she said.
Sunday after church, called her phone like gazillion times, no answer still, I am now really troubled. Are this people trying to cover up something. Why will the phone ring sometimes and next time straight to voice mail, Oluwa please o.
Enters mr 2 horn monster (father of all lies) in my head
2 Horn monster: "You remember the dream you had, where you and your siblings went home and they were asking you that you are now in charge" and remember your mum's friend died 3 years ago..blah blah"
30+: "God please no, she is still young, I want her to see my kids."
2 Horn monster:"You remember what they said in church about the angel of death"
30+: "And so, shebi we prayed, wo for the fact that I have committed her to Baba God, I rebuke any bad report, notin mus hapin to her I am going to sleep". It was only 8pm but I forced myself to sleep.
I woke up midnight, still not feeling happy but I am resolute, my life is in God's hand and I choose not to fret. Come to think of it EVEN if I worry it does not add 1 cubit to my height (I seriously wish it could), so I busied myself scurrying all over Blogville for gist. After a while I called my sister and asked if she has heard from Mummy
Sis: 'No, but I spoke to her on Friday'
30+: 'Since Friday, did she tell you she was not feeling well'
Sis: 'Yees and so, she is covered by the blood of Jesus, e wo sis please call me back tomorrow meehn, I am sleeping'
She is sleeping, when she has not heard from mama 30+. My memory flashes back to some years ago when my mum came to wake me middle of the night;
Mama 30+: '30+ are you sleeping'
30+: 'Ooh kilode'?!
Mama 30+: 'Sorry but somo pe 18+(my younger bruv) is not back since sha (trying to sound casual).'
30+: 'Ehn...is he not old enough to be a baba bomboy, please live me jo, if you are that worried just pray' and I promptly went back to sleep.
Years later, I am now the worry freak, how the tide has Turned, I must be getting old.
Anyways finally this evening (Monday), my phone rang and it was mama 30+, I was so overjoyed.
30+: 'Mummy e so ara yin o (you better be careful), never you do that to me again, how can you call me to say you were not feeling well and then you go AWOL'.
Mama 30+: 'I knew you will be worried, sorry my dear, sho mo ko si ina, and mi o le charge phone mi (no electricity to charge my phone), and that generator forget it. In fact phone ore mi ni mo nlo (I am using my friends phone), this country is seriously sick, pelu gbogbo rubbish facility won, 30+ nothing works'.
30+: 'O rubbish naa ni and you are still there, e ya ma gbe eru yin ki e ma bo nisiyin (pack your load and come now), otherwise I am coming over to deport you'.
Mama 30+: '(Laughs) Eh sorry o ti binu (you are upset), you know Baba God dey look after me now, I have so much to do, weddings, naming ceremoies Birthdays awon great grandchildren mi (she laughs). Anway o le believe pe mi o ti je (I have not eaten) anything since Friday'.
30+: 'Ope o, that means you have lost weight by force, shebi that is what you wanted'.
Mama 30+: 'O serious, call me back jo, credit ti low'.
Can't wait for her to come back (i am sure we will be fighting after 5 minutes). Which brings me to this no one can be like a mother, sometimes I get all hung up on becoming a mother, because I have seen what they go through and it's some scary stuff meehn. I don't know how they do it but BOTTOM LINE IS MOTHERS ARE LIKE ROCKS and yes they rock, they are just too much.
You must have heard this song like hundreds of time but still I am dedicating this song to my Mum, infact all our Mums and Mums on Blogville (and not only biological). I also remember London Buki's Mom specially with earnest prayer for quick healing.
And for anyone missing their mum right now whether because of a temporary distance or otherwise, celebrate their memories.