Jasmine S****thing Gr***n Tea

Would you like a cuppa 30+, oh yes please can I have the jasmine s***thing green tea (quickly eyeing the label, to pronounce it well), after all I have to make them believe this very tea is on the shelf in my kitchen.

The secretary passed my tea to me and she looked at me funny I ignored her. Anyways home girl continued talking, I was in my element pitching my report and convincing the boss that those contractors were doing a drab job.

Boss interjected after like 15 minutes of my ranting (i mean reporting) I gingerly picked up my cup to savour this “new brand of tea with shinning green label”, I nod my head in time to pretend like I was hearing the gibberish she was saying and put the cup to my mouth, the next thing you see pwaaaaaaarh I spit all over my boss and the contractor manager.

I am so sorry it’s still quite hot I said in the most professional English I could muster, and I saw my repometer (reputation meter) nose dive big time.

The silly girl taking notes looked at me with a knowing look as per common that tea has been sitting for 15 minutes "there is no way it’s still hot", so I eye her back as per "foolish girl why did you give me tea that taste like omi igbe (shit water!) and you expect me to down it".

Are you alright my boss says, I replied it's okay, hankies were passed so I could wipe the dribble around my mouth and the table, anyway oga continued talking while contract manager smiled sheepishly I am sure I saw a glint in his eye saying "God catch you, shebi you said we are doing a drab job!" And I smiled back sheepishly and replied with my eyes “at least you got stains on your shirt, hope you spend a lot to get it out”